The show must go on.
“Honsla rakh doli na, Din aunga bas boli na “ - Waheguru .
These are the words that has kept me going thru on worst of my days , days where I felt the emotions would engulf me , days where I wanted to run somewhere, somehow leaving everything behind , days When I covered my mouth on a public transit to mask a breakdown because my tears couldn’t wait until I reached my bed and found a pillow to hide my pain with . The days when I choose to sit and stare at the sky all the way till dawn - questioning and hoping someone from up and above this world will hear and answer my plea , the days when I skipped morning lectures because with a chest so heavy it was difficult to put on a show and drag myself to a class , The days when I wished I had the power to go back in time just to undo some events , unfeeling was my dream , days when I took more then 45 minutes standing under the shower - cold and numb - trying to figure out where it all went wrong , who is at blame ? and what is at stake ?The days when I did question each decision of my life - both the ones that rewarded me and the ones that were a lesson all along . The days when I hated my own self for giving too much , loving too hard , falling to deep , sticking a bit longer , worrying a bit much and giving a thought more then the usual . The days when I wanted to forget why , where and how I came along this long and this far . The days that I wanted to fly by - as quickly as they can , not because I was tired of the pain that on somedays came in heavy tides and waves - by then it was actually more or less a habit and not something I was now scared of but the days had to pass by, so that I can know what the next day would bring , why the universe had been asking me to continue , (putting me on sea to sail that I somehow got trapped into but never intentionally chose ) - to see how and why it was worth it to keep my mouth shut when all I wanted was to scream it out , back answer and tell why , where and how much I have been wronged , how I felt all the way or how it all changed me - made me into a person I am not and checked me in - in a category where I don’t belong . But the days kept on passing by despite everything In and around I kept on believing and even now I do - no choice yet because to find all the justifiable reasons of my unanswered questions and for it all to make sense for once , somewhere , somehow , some day - THE SHOW MUST GO ON !
- Prachi Chandrika Patel